Oh No! You Got Feedback!

By Rene Santana on October 23, 2019

The best piece of feedback I was given was that my prose was sloppy. I wholeheartedly agreed. When it came to writing, I was terrible. It was mostly because I never re-read my work after I finished it. If I wasn’t willing to take in feedback though, I wouldn’t be here writing this post. I use to also never make a point in articles before a year ago. There was an ambiguous theme, but nothing solid to stand on. Now I all I can do is focus on one thing. Call it constructive criticism, honest feedback, or critical critiques. It’s all people’s personal interpretation of you.

Image by Manfred Steger from Pixabay

Whether you’re just starting off or have been progressing steadily in your career, you should always be out getting feedback. It’s one of the few vital things you need for a healthy career. Sometimes, you won’t need to do any searching. People like to share their thoughts regardless if you ask. Just keep your ears open, even if what you hear is heartbreaking. You may even get feedback on your feedback. I had this happen to me when I was trying to find things to say about a peer’s essay. I hadn’t ever been harsh with critiques, but I had let my temper fly with this one essay, and I was immediately called out for it. I felt embarrassed but learned instantly where to draw the line for negative feedback.

One way to potentially look at feedback is like data. With enough feedback, you could try to compile it into a word document, and with the search function, find keywords that pop up frequently. You can also search for the common thread on your own by writing down the exact comments you were given. In doing so, you’re looking for a place to start for improving yourself, rather than letting yourself plateau.

Don’t dig into it immediately though. Let those comments sit for a day or two. In her article, Emily Petsko brings a study about feedback that shows, “[t]hose who took days or weeks to digest the feedback they had received were better off for it, with many taking the comments to heart and actively working to improve themselves.” All the feedback I’ve received has helped me grow months after I first heard it. It’ll always feel like an attack at first. In a sense, it is. Your efforts are being torn apart at a microscopic level. But giving yourself some time to cool down and reflect on it will help you better understand why someone said what they said and what to do about it.

Consider feedback is a balancing act. It takes grace, but you can’t let it get you down. You also can’t just brush it off. And lastly, it is NOT a necessary evil. In fact, it’s what makes us better human beings. As a writer, I always fear it, but I love it at the same time. It’s the truest form of the “double edge sword” metaphor. And as Joseph M. Reagle Jr. states in his book Reading the Comments, ”feedback is not easy to give or receive, and communities of learners must negotiate their expectations and feelings about the practice.” Communicating is already difficult as it is, so adding feedback only makes it less desirable. But I can guarantee you after you learn to use everyone’s suggestions, positive or negative, you’ll find it easier and easier to improve yourself.

Taking in all the comments and suggestions can be a lesson humility. You have to be open and accept complete opposite perspectives. Sure, it’s nice to be right and succeed. Have people agree with you. And everyone else who doesn’t? You just can turn the other cheek to them. But you wouldn’t have learned anything significant in the end because success is a terrible teacher. So don’t get too comfortable. Failure, on the other hand, is a dove throwing out pearls. Search for feedback amongst your peers, readers, listeners, and workers. You may have something great to offer, but why stop there? You should always be improving your skills and talents. Don’t matter if it ain’t broke. Go and make it better!

Here’s one last push to help you dive into the deep end. From Deirdre Clarke’s Ouch. How to Accept Constructive Criticism in Stride:

If you assume that all is well because you aren’t receiving any constructive criticism, think again. Most people will not offer it freely since it can be such a touchy subject. Get over your fear of asking for advice on how to improve. Yes, constructive criticism usually stings when you hear it, but it is crucial into growing professionally. Your career will thank you for it.

If I can have one last word, I want to say: never give your goals and dreams. Your ambition and pride can only get you so far, so don’t shy away from feedback. Let be the thing that propels you into far above the clouds and pushes you to dream bigger.

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